Bella and Edward deleted scenes
by cutiehoney913
Summary: Bella and Edward having the most ridiculous arguement ever which starts out with peanut butter then ends with organic french fries. Hilariously funny. R


**hihi..i haven't written anything in a LONGLONG time:D**

**i hope you enjoy my story and please please REVIEW..and i'll love you forever..haha..okay here it goes..**

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Mr. Peanut dude was staring at me when i was sitting on my cushy sofa..

My teddy bear, Mr. Gordo looked depressed next to the jar of peanut butter..

Im sorry Mr. Peanut dude..I know Mr. Gordo kinda stinks..He went poopy poop _the_ number 2..

_Omg..what am i doing..i must be going pshyco thinking about jars and stuffed bears...I dont even like peanut butter...Im more of a jam..y person..little did everybody know..that peanut butter makes you go #2...not kidding.._

_okay..im going to stop talking about poop and peanut..(haha..they both start with p's..)..peepee reminds me of urine...._

Okay...foe show..i am done with huma- er...stuffed poop thingys..

I was waiting for _him..._

We had gotten in an argument yesterday night about global warming.

I know its a stupid topic but hey...we are all going to die because of CHINA!!..Stupid Chinese people..

I heard the car door shut outside and I ran down the stairs tripping atleast the whole way..

Edward was there to catch me when i lost my balance...Why did he had to look like runaway model.

_(sighs )"_Bella..can you please try to be careful?"

_My words came out quick so fast I was surprised myself.._"I just wanted to meet you asap that i didnt watch where i was going..and plus..I wanted to apologize for yesterday..I know your

way more smarter than me and more nature experienced and...stuff"

"Bella..its fine..I was the one who was ridiculous..and I came here to say something to you..."

_Oh no...is he about to say that I have booger sticking out of my nose?? I knew i should have blew my nose when it was itchy.._

"Bella...."

_He looks so....so..I couldnt describe it.._

"Bella..darling..I have to tell you something I have kept it to myself all these days with you..."

_Aw-oh..._

"I..I..can read your mind....I was just..I wanted to make you look special..Im sorry if it was personal.."

_Wha- wait!!?? What!!!_

"Sorry love..I just..I couldnt keep it together..because....because...I.......I LOVE PEANUT BUTTER!!!!"

He ripped off his shirt to reveal..one of a kind "I heart peanut butter" tattoo..

I just stared at him with my jaws open so wide a fly flew in my mouth..

I started to choke and suddenly Edward took out his mini jar of peanut butter and spoon and shoved a giant spoon full of peanut butter in my mouth

_Wteff??.._

"Dont wteff and just swallow..it will get the fly taste off your mouth.."

I swallowed the peanut butter...I could feel the fly struggling to get out of my mouth..poor little guy...

"Oh yeah..i forgot that you read my mind..which comes back to me......YOU READ WHEN I WAS THINKING ABOUT MY BOOGERS??"

"Uh..and your bear poop problems too..yeah.."

"Oh and you get a "I heart peanut butter" tattoo and not a "I love Bella" tattoo??...I cannot believe this.."

"So let me get this straight..your mad at me because i got a "I heart peanut butter tattoo" but not because I lied to you"?

"Awhuh.."

And then he exploded..

"WELL YOU DONT SEE ME COMPLAING ABOUT HOW YOU TOTALLY DISS THE GREATEST THING IN THE WORLD A.K.A. PEANUT BUTTER"!!

"WELL YOUR COMPLAINING NOW..SO READ MY JELLY LOVIN LIPS_..PEANUT BUTTER MAKES YOU POOOOP ALLOOOOOTT!!!"_

"IMMA VAMP!! I DONT GO NUMBER TWO!!!.."

"OH SO YOUR CONSTIPATED TOO HUH??..IS THERE ANYTHING ELSE YOU WANT TO TELL ME EDDY??"

"What are you my MOTHER?!!! Stop nagging on me like an old LADY!!!"

"Oh..nawhuh..you did NOT just go there AGAIN!!!!"

"Well..umm..hon??..I JUST DID...!!! OH YAAAWW!!!

"GET out of my house.."

"I WAS ABOUT TO LEAVE THANK YOU VERY MUCH!!"

_First global warming..now peanut butter..wow..we have problems..i think we need therapy.._

"Lets go sign up for some...and...and..i love you..im sorry that im addicted to peanut butter.."

"Aww..your so cute when you apologize..its okay...im sorrry too.."

"Let us go...for some signing up..and I'll buy you some organic french fries.."

"Oh Edward..you know me so well.."

And we rode off to the twilight horizon together..eating our organic french fries..mine dipped in jelly..his dipped in the one and only peanut butter...and we made a perfect match..and i promised myself not to diss peanut butter ever again..

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**Yes..i know..this is so weird..but hey..they dont just call me weird for nothing...**

**but i hoped you liked it...its suppose to be funny...so please please REVIEW and no nasty meany ewwy stuff D: im sensitive..hahajkjk**

**but try to be nice:D**

**thanks a bunch!!**

**oh and my sister helped:D.**

**puhahaha:D ilyguys..**

**-Sawah:)**


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